Memorial Day pics

I posted photos of Nicholas at the Memorial Day parade on my Flickr site yesterday.
After about 45 minutes, we both got bored and decided to head back to the car. But first we stopped at Millenium Fountain. I ran into some friends who have four kids of their own, plus some stragglers. Seeing some kids was all it took for Nicholas to run right into the water and get soaked. The dad from the other family saw his kids run in and started to call out to stop them -- but caught himself. It's Memorial Day and you're only a kid once.

Do not taunt Happy Fun ball

My colleague Melissa used to work in a bureau, a remote outpost deep in the bush of Boone County. Now she works in my office. Yesterday, she had this interchange with a reporter who's still out there in the bureau about an iPod alarm clock thingy that she left there. Jerry is another employee who works out there...

From: K
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 11:35 AM
To: M
Subject: your clock

Hey, your alarm clock/radio goes off every day at 3:30 p.m. and we don't know how to stop it.

From: M
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 11:36 AM
To: K
Subject: RE: your clock

ok, that's super-weird. just unplug it maybe??

From: K
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 11:36 AM
To: M
Subject: RE: your clock

We did. But it kept going anyway. Then, Wednesday, it killed Jerry. Now the walls won't stop bleeding.

So much for that idea

I said I was going to buy a new car to save money on gas. Note past progressive tense of "go." Upon further investigation, buying a tiny car that gets twice the gas mileage of my Ford Explorer will not save me money at all. In fact, it will cost me much, much more.
How can this be, you ask. Well, it seems that every buffoon in America who bought an SUV over the last six years has decided to dump it in favor of more fuel efficient models. So the trade-in market is glutted with gas-guzzling trucks. My dealer will give me $500 less than what I owe on my Ford. Nice. That means I'd have to come up with about $1,100 now to cover the loan payoff, plus tax, title and license fees.
Then I found out that insuring a motorized skateboard built in 2005 is far more expensive than insuring a loaded SUV built four years earlier. Like about $130 more every six months.
So being the industrious fellow I am, I calculated what it would cost me to buy the little car versus to keep the big Ford, which will be paid off in 18 months. And guess what? Over the course of three years of law school, owning the Kia would save me $2,500 in gasoline, but still cost nearly $3,700 more than keeping the Ford thanks to the extra payments and insurance premiums.
Guess I'll keep the road hog. So much for reducing my carbon footprint. Can't say I'm too sad about this. It's much more fun to drive down the highway in the Explorer.

House for sale

The house went on the market yesterday. Take a look. It's a steal.
Both Meegan and I are sad about selling it. It's was our first house. It's huge: four bedrooms, 2,000 square feet, nice yard. Good for a big family. We put a lot of work into it. I refinished the floors and did the landscape. She painted and decorated it. Our plans for it disintegrated with our marriage, so it's bittersweet to say goodbye to it.
But I guess I feel good that someone else will be able to write their family story in it. I hope it's a good one.

My child is brilliant...

Yesterday, I desperately needed to mow the lawn. The grass was so tall that safari groups were losing their way in it for days. But Nicholas was with me so I asked him if he wanted to come outside and ride his bike while I mowed so I could keep an eye on him. He said, no, I'd rather watch a movie.
So I told him he could come outside whenever he finished. I left the back door open and absentmindedly shut the door between the kitchen and the back porch -- forgetting that even though that door has no lock, Nicholas can't twist the 90-year-old doorknob enough to open it himself. So I had unwittingly locked him in the house.
About 10 minutes later, I'm blazing away on the lawn, oblivious to any sound other than the roar of the mower. My neighbor's son runs up and yells that my car alarm is going off. I run around to the garage and as I do, I look up at the living room window and see Nicholas inside, tears streaming down his face.
He was beside himself because he couldn't get out of the house. He must have tried to get my attention through the windows because his stuffed bunny was lying next to the front door glass. But I couldn't hear him. So possessing advanced critical thinking skills at the age of 5, he pushed the panic button on my car key fob and set off the alarm to alert me.
After I calmed him down, he confirmed my theory. I didn't even know he understood what the red horn button meant on my key chain. But he figured out a way to get my attention. My child is a genius...
And I am a horrible father.

Perks

Today I'm working from home because I don't have child care. So I'm sitting at a picnic table at a park watching Nicholas play and writing stories on my laptop.
I should work from home more often.

Good answer

A man staggered under the crippling burdens of his life, falling to his knees in despair before all of Heaven. He raised his hands in agony, demanding of God, "Why me, Lord?"

And a Voice from Heaven rang out, "Why not you?"

(Stolen from commenter 'Jean' in this post)

Bye, bye comfort and luxury

I have to buy a new (used) car. My 2001 Ford Explorer is getting way too expensive to fill up -- I'm going to hit $75 a tank with gas approaching $4 a gallon. Did I mention it sucks down petrol at the rate of about 14 miles a gallon in the city?
I'll probably be driving back and forth regularly to see Nicholas after I go to law school, which is a 175 miles one way. So I'm opting for an economy car.

A part of me died to write that.

You see, I thought I had given up little cars for good when I bought my honking SUV two years ago. My 6'2" frame fits inside it comfortably. I can haul stuff. I can stomp on the gas and it moves. It's fun to drive in the snow. When I commuted back and forth to the suburbs every day, I drove a Hyundai Accent and then a Saturn SC2. While the Hyundai was acceptable because it had some headroom, I hated the Saturn because it was too low slung.
But the cold, hard reality is that I'll need a commuter car again to trek between Iowa City and Rockford. Blecch. Here's the hatchback I'm considering, a 2005 Kia Rio Cinco.
There's pros and cons to this deal. Here they are...
What I'll get:
Twice the gas mileage.
Warm feelings knowing that my carbon footprint is diminished (yeah, I wasn't really losing sleep over that one anyway).
A CD player that works consistently (who cares, all my music is MP3s now anyway).
What I'll have to do without:
Cruise control
Power windows
Tilt steering that actually accommodates my frame.
Power door locks
Stretching out my legs while driving.
Power mirrors
Acceleration
Power seat adjustment
Cargo room and a roof rack
A quiet, smooth ride
Antilock brakes
Less expensive insurance rates
Enjoyable driving

Playground photos

I just put up new photos of Nicholas on my Flickr site. They're from our trip to the "Castle Park" today. That's what he calls the old Project Playworks, a massive wooden playground that I played on as a kid. Come to think of it, I also made out with a girl there as a teenager.
It was moved from northeast Rockford out near the Speedway in Machesney Park.
Anyway, discerning viewers will notice that Nicholas is wearing the exact same shirt in both the playground shots and the bowling pics from February. That's because he chose his own clothes today.

Early morning blogging

It's 3 a.m. and I can't get back to sleep. I woke up at 1:45 and haven't been able to nod off yet.
I must have reached a certain age where sleep becomes more precious and elusive because as a kid and a teen, I would've been able to fall right back to sleep.
But through the excesses of 21st century technology, I am able to lie in bed and blog. It's dark, but the glow of my backlit Palm is all I need. Besides blogging, I've been able to read the NY Times and the Trib as well as browse Blackberries. I'm hoping to replace this wireless PDA with a keyboard smartphone. I'm favoring the Pearl because it's small, but several folks have told me they don't like the keyboard setup. I guess I'll find out near the end of June when my current phone, a battered 2-year-old RAZR, becomes eligible for replacement.
Ok, I've blogged about nothing long enough. Hopefully I can sleep now.

Taxes and tasks

I received my property tax bill in the mail today. It will be the last one I get for a while because the house goes up for sale on Monday.
Here's a fun fact: The Rockford Township assessor thinks my house is worth $100,146. Yeah, right. I might be able to get that price if I left it on the market for 18 months. It's going to list at $94,000 and I'll be happy to get $92,000 for it. The local real estate market went into the tank last year. Some say it's getting better, but as long as we break even with this house, I'll be happy.
So I've got to paint the porch, clean the place, straighten up the ramshackle basement and replace some broken plaster before the end of the weekend.
I'll let you know how it goes.

Hundred days

According to my counter on the right, there's 100 days left until I start law school. As much as I'm nervous about the transition, I'm also excited for a fresh start.
Lots of things will change before that first day though. My house is going on the market Monday. There's only about 90 days from when I'll actually move to Iowa City.

Nicholas' impact on me

I realize after that last post what a normative effect Nicholas has had on me during the last year and a half. Meegan and I separated in November 2006 and since then he's lived with me.
The pain of the separation then was so great that I really just wanted to give up. As a recovering alcoholic, that meant anesthetizing myself with gallons of booze. As in, Nicholas Cage in Leaving Las Vegas. But I couldn't do that because Nicholas lived with me. So I went to AA and stayed sober instead. I don't know if I would've done that initially without his presence.
Now I realize as I face feelings of loneliness again that Nicholas gets me out of myself and forces me to act like an adult (or my closest imitation of one). So in some ways, he's been my salvation.

Down time

I am so sad right now. I just feel empty and lonely. It seems I get shaky like this at least once a day. I don't like it and I'm always looking for something to relieve this feeling.
I think normal people just go through these times, but I can hardly stand it.
Nicholas was in Chicago with his aunt and uncle this weekend, so I had the house to myself. I had a lot of work to do because we're putting it on the market in a week. But I only completed two tasks: mowing the lawn and pressure-washing the garage and porch for painting. I couldn't do much more because I got so down and felt so alone.
I was glad when Nicholas got back. I asked my brother to come over yesterday too.