I write the songs that make only a tiny part of the world sing

In the pantheon of stupid ideas Rockford has come up with to justify itself to the rest of the world, I think I've found the greatest achievement. But first let's take a moment to remember a couple of the best...
There is the timeless Symbol welcoming drivers - and warding off evil spirits - along Illinois 251. I've always thought the giant red sculpture looks like a cross between a garish Christmas present bow and a medieval weapon.
There's my personal favorite, a tourism bureau advertising blitz from the 1990s. The tagline was "Rockford: A different kind of greatness." Huh?
But this one is the best by far. Apparently, the 'ole Chamber of Commerce once took it upon themselves to put together a collection of amateur songwriters' ditties on Rockford. Pure awful. Among the lyrics: "Catch a smile on the Whitman Street bridge."
Please, please, please visit this link and listen. I just can't do it justice here.